Photos from the 12-26-15 Show at the Inwood Theatre
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Tag: Dallas
0 Photos: 12-26-15 Inwood Theatre
0 Show Report: Halloween Weekend 2015 at the Inwood!
Show Report: Halloween Weekend 2015 at the Inwood!
By Phil Banker
FRIDAY NIGHT CAST:
Frank: Jenny
Brad: Megaaaan
Janet: Kyle
Riff: PhilBanker
Magenta: Manda
Columbia: Brooklyn
Dr. Scott: Joe
Rocky: Snow
Eddie: Pete
The Criminologist: Gus
TRANSIE ARMY: Ace, Ali, Baldwin, Beau, Fleep, Haley, Heather, Henry, Javier, Jessi, Jon, Mason, Rex, Tana
TECH/GRIP: Super Sexy Sean, Paul, Pete, Danny, Davey, Sky, Eris, Sara Darling, Jennifer
FLOORWALKERS: Jason, Alex, Sean
SATURDAY NIGHT CAST:
Frank: Jenny
Brad: Johnny Fuckin’ Felder
Janet: Jessi
Riff: Gus
Magenta: Megaaaan
Columbia: Ali
Dr. Scott: Joe
Rocky: Baldwin
Eddie: Pete
The Criminologist: Phil Banker
TRANSIE ARMY: Ace, Adrienne, Brooklyn, Fleep, Haley, Henry, Javier, Heather, Jon, Kyle, Manda, Mason, Rex, Tana
TECH/GRIP: Paul, Pete, Gus, Baldwin, Manda, Sara Darling, Jennifer, Eris, Davey, Sean
FLOORWALKERS: Jason, Alex, Sean, PhilBanker
The dust has settled, two weeks have passed and I’ve finally managed to muster the required give-a-shit to write a show report for the Halloween shows! What can be said, really: we sold the Inwood out two nights in a row, the weather held up long enough for us to be mostly dry (to start the shows at least), and the crowd was good and drunk and rowdy, just like we like ’em.
This year’s pre-shows featured guys getting lap dances from other guys, Gus and Fleep overlooking the gorgeous Kyle to cornhole each other on stage, and two damn fine zombies eviscerated some rube in a top hat on stage.
One of the unforeseen difficulties of sold out Halloween shows is the logistics of running a costume contest with a sold out show. Golly, lots of people came in costume, who knew! We need to find a way to winnow that crowd down a little next year. Maybe we could just institute “Tits To Win” from the get-go. Or throw down a handful of weapons and let nature take its course. Either way, it still went great and lots of contestants went home with “valuable” prizes!
Highlights from Friday’s show include Kyle returning for the first time in a long time as Janet! She’s a precious perfect cinnamon roll and we’re lucky to have her around. We were also graced with a visit from Bastard alum Squid back home from the wild and wooly northlands! He jumped on stage to transie for us and even joined in on a little Snow rape with Danny in the tank. What better way to celebrate coming back to Texas!
Oh, and that rube from earlier made his debut as Riff. He’s alright.
Saturday night saw the prodigal Baldwin return as Rocky! We haven’t seen his glorious golden ass in too long. Johnny Fuckin’ Felder made a once in a blue moon appearance as he is wont to do. All that swooning and fainting Jessi did? That’s not acting, she’s just reacting to Johnny. But goodness, who doesn’t act that way!
We’ll be back at the Inwood on November 28 for our post-Thanksgiving show! Bail on your awful families, shake off that turkey coma and come shindig with us!
0 Photos: 10-30-15 Inwood Theatre
Photos from the 10-30-15 show at the Inwood Theatre
0 Next Show: November 28th at the Inwood Theatre!
Los Bastardos will be performing at the Inwood Theatre in Dallas on November 28th at Midnight! Come out and see us!
Dont forget to check out our Facebook Page for daily updates on all things LB!
0 Photos: 10-23-15 Ridglea Theater!
Photos from the 10-23-15 show at the Ridglea Theater
0 Show Report: August 8, 2015 Ridglea Theatre
Show Report for August 8th 2015, by Phil Banker
CAST:
Frank: Jenny
Brad: Ali
Janet: Jessi
Riff: Gus
Magenta: Megaaaan
Columbia: Brooklyn
Rocky: Super Sexy Sean
Dr. Scott: Gregg
Eddie: Pete
The Criminologist: Eris
TECH/SOUND/PROPS/GRIP: Carrie, Jennifer, Danny, Pete, Sean, Baldwin, Joe, Paul, Phil, Madame Leah
TRANSIE ARMY: Baldwin, Fleep, Javier, Haley, Manda, Rainbow, Mason, Rex, Kyle, Jon, Sidney
FLOORWALKERS: Alex, Jason, Phil, Sean
Take the loud, rowdy and likely hammered crowd from last week at the Texas Theatre and multiply it several times over, and you’d have something approximating the screaming hordes that filled the Ridglea Theatre on Aug. 8. What a show! What a crowd! What a great venue to watch us in and get summarily drunk!
We always try to bring a little bit extra to the Ridglea, it being such a classy joint and all. Luckily the lovely ladies of the Glitterati Revue joined us to open the show with several burlesque acts for your enjoyment. It’s like stripping, but way classier. Especially when you’re wearing nothing but pasties and a monocle. (Note: I don’t know if this has been done or not, but if it hasn’t, you’re welcome ladies)
LB kicked off our show with a set of pre-shows both old and new, including Baldwin doing “Jizz in my Pants,” Leah and several other cast gentlemen doing “Call Me Maybe,” several lovely cast ladies surrounding Pete for “Peacock,” and unfortunately the return of “Soccer Practice,” this time with Mason playing the part of the poor straight man falling to Sean the Gay Pimp’s clutches. It wasn’t me this time, so I consider it a success!
This week’s Virgin games was “Fuck Like a Bastard,” in which virgins race Bastards to see who could pop balloons with their hideous pelvic gyrations. The Bastards won (naturally) but we gave prizes to the virgins anyway because, well, Jason brought a bigass can of yams and he didn’t want to take it home.
Performing in the Ridglea is always unique, because the staff there treats us like rockstars. We, in turn, do our best to put on a rock star show, and our cast did not disappoint. Everyone was on point this week, especially our newest Janet, Jessi. She really knocked us out of our seat! Well, not us, some other guy. I think he’s okay, because there’s many worse things that can happen to you than getting knocked to the floor by a pretty young lady.
Other things happened as well! Brooklyn did the lift! Sean carried Jenny legs first for death scene! People laughed at my Mad Max reference! One of the really hot Transies took her pants off! This is just a sampling of the fun you missed out on! But don’t fret, we’re coming back to Dallas for our Aug. 22 show at the Inwood Theatre!
Los Bastardos: same great taste, less filling.
0 Photos: Aug 1 2015 Texas Theatre
Photos from Aug 1st 2015 at the Texas Theatre
0 Show Report: August 1st, 2015 Texas Theatre
Show report by Jason
CAST:
Frank: Jenny
Brad: Gus
Janet: Jessi
Riff: Jon
Magenta: Megaaaan
Columbia: Brooklyn
Rocky: Super Sexy Sean
Dr. Scott: Gregg
Eddie: Pete
The Criminologist: Eris
TRANSIE ARMY: Baldwin, Cameron, Fleep, Javier, Haley, Rex, Mason, Rainbow
TECH/SOUND/GRIP/PROPS: Phil Banker, Sara Darling, Danny, Sean, Cody, Baldwin, Madame Leah, Pete, Paul
FLOORWALKERS: Jason, Alex, Phil Banker, Cody, Sean
We could get used to these early shows. Kicking off the proceedings at 10:30 p.m. gives us enough time to put on an awesome show, thrill an audience, pack up, get some food in us and get home before sunrise. The audience last Saturday at the Texas Theatre seemed to approve as well, as they were one of the most excited and energetic crowds we’ve had in a long time!
That or it was the booze. Or the historic venue. Or the fact that our cast is easily the best looking in Texas. Either way, the next crowd has big shoes to fill.
One of the highlights of this week’s pre-show antics was the magical box of butts! Somehow, we got a hold of a box full of small foam butts. There was no way we could keep this treasure trove to ourselves, so not only were the little foam butts given away as virgin game prizes, but Alex just started throwing tiny butts at random audience members. See? When you come to a Los Bastardos show, you’re bound to get a little ass.
Speaking of virgin games, this week marked the return of a classic LB game, where our contestants have to Lady and the Tramp a twizzler between the two of them. Brooklyn found the perfect couple of frat bros to awkwardly do it, while two girls went at it in a version of the game we call “Please Just Do It.” Everybody wins!
The bubbly-as-always Jenny played Frank, once again playing the character probably the most unlike how she is in real life. Gus and Jenni played everyone’s least favorite innocents Brad and Janet, while cast veterans Jon and Megaaaaan played Riff and Magenta. Brooklyn returned as Columbia, and nailed “the lift” better than ever before, with more than a little help from Pete as Eddie. Brooklyn dealt with the bird, and dealt with it hard.
We’re keeping this party going this Saturday at the Ridglea Theatre, with special guests Glitterati Revue putting on a burlesque set before our show! Doors open at 8 with the burlesque show starting at 8:45, and we’ll hit the stage at 10! Get your tickets now, because it’s going to be one hell of a show!
0 Show Report: July 25, 2015 Inwood Theatre
Show report by Phil Banker
CAST
Frank – Jenny
Brad – Gus
Janet – Jessi
Riff – Jon
Magenta – Manda
Columbia – Brooklyn
Rocky – Baldwin
Eddit – Rainbow
Dr. Scott – Pete
The Criminologist – Eris
TECH/SOUND/GRIP/PROPS Carrie, Sara Darling, Super Sexy Sean, Rainbow, Danny, Joe
TRANSIE ARMY Ali, Kyle, Fleep, Haley, Rexy, Mason, Javier
FLOORWALKERS Alex, Super Sexy Sean, Phil Banker
It’s the dog days of summer, so what better way to cool off AND turn up the heat than with a Rocky Horror beach party! Los Bastardos brought all the appeals of a beach to the Inwood Theatre on July 25, without all the downsides of sharks, jellyfish, pointy sand, dolphins, irresponsible boaters, and the only sand in sight is whatever your ex-girlfriend brought in her vagina.
What we did provide was bikinis, mankinis, inbetweenkinis and a whole lot of goofy pool accessories, delighting a theatre full of pseudo-beachgoers. Let’s be real here: you’re always likely to see some skin at a Los Bastardos show, so why not have some fun with it?
We departed from the theme a little bit for this weeks virgin games in light of this week’s news regarding Hulk Hogan. Several Bastards are very big wrestling fans, and news that Hulk Hogan is actually a racist sack of shit hit us all hard. If, by hit us all hard, you mean “made us laugh uncontrollably in a storm of internet memes.” Naturally, this show’s virgin game had Gus forcing contestants to dotheir best Hulk Hogan impression by tearing off a t-shirt. By the end of the contest one lucky winner walked away with a framed photo of the Hulkster and a t-shirt as dead as his career!
Saturday’s show saw the debut of Jessi as our newest Janet! Despite her young age Jessi is a veteran stage performer, so it was no surprise she took to slutting it up for us like a duck to water. Gus did a great job dragging her along as Brad, but Jessi held her own molesting Baldwin as Rocky and rocked it in the floor show. We can’t wait to see what else she can show us.
Also debuting this past Saturday was Phil Banker as floorwalker. Me. I can’t speak objectively as to how well I did, but I managed to keep a group of about ten drunk 40-year-olds alternating between laughing and groaning for the whole show, so I’ve got comedy skills on par with the average early afternoon Vegas warm up comic. It’s a start!
Crowd favorite Jenny returned as Frank-n-Furter, alongside Brooklyn, Manda and Jon as Columbia, Magenta and Riff-Raff, respectively. Rainbow appeared as everyone’s half-dead rock-and-roll zombie Eddie and Alpha Beard Pete played Dr. Scott complete with his now-trademark body stocking for floor show. It’s a good thing so many people came out in their beach clothes, because everyone went home wet(and for once it wasn’t because of broken A/C in the theatre)!
If you missed out on this show, fret not: we’ve got three shows scheduled before we ship off to New York City in September for Rocky Con. We’ll be at the Texas Theatre at 10:30 p.m. Saturday, Aug. 1, followed by our third show at the Ridglea Theatre in Fort Worth on Aug. 8, complete with a burlesque show beforehand!
Our socks are soaked, but our pants are bone dry: everything’s coming up LB!
0 Photos: July 25th 2015, Inwood Theatre
Photos from our show on July 25th, 2015 at the Ridglea Theatre. … Continue Reading
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