Show report for Saturday December 18th 2010
Report by Jason
Happy holidays everyone! I’m actually writing this on Christmas morning, because I am all alone in the cold. Yes, be sad for me. Anyway, here’s the lineup:
Dr. Scott: Charles
But this is the last show of the year, and Madame Leah hate…err, loves us, so since the crowd was so festive (and so many people were still recovering from Bastard Christmas the night before) she gave us all an early present with a Name out of Hat show!!! Well, Name out of the Small Plastic Cups, but the general idea is still there. So here’s the new lineup:
Frank: Adrienne (Good thing she had the eye makeup on)
Janet: Rex (Not a stretch)
Brad: Ashley (Naughty)
Riff: Sean (Keeping it in the family)
Magenta: Wheels (Dirty)
Columbia: Britt (Him and Adrienne doing the wife swap)
Dr. Scott: Danny (In a dress…courage)
Rocky: Eris (Heh heh heh)
Eddie: Heather (Smaller than the motorcycle)
Crimmy: Wes (Like an elf)
Transies: Abby (Hot), Bizah (Hot), Eleni (New), Jon (Naughty), Keely (Angular), Kelci (New), Kenzie (Not legal yet), Kris (New), Kristina (Legal as of today), Kyle (Cute), London (Cyborg), Lyndi (Adorable), Rachel (Almost naked), and Snowflake (Retarded).
Tech/Sound/Props: Chance, Austin, Mary, Scott, Charles, Paul, Jeremy, Chicago Mike, Sean, and Danny
Floorwalkers: Jason, Cody, Gus, David, and Wes
So the die was cast, and this White Elephant lineup was settled. Charles decided to smart off to Leah, and thus was put in as tag team Frank. The audience looked pretty hot, and the effort was appreciated. We got to see some folks we haven’t seen in forever (YES, I’M TALKING TO YOU!!! HUGS!!!), as well as some special Christmas virgins (who hopefully didn’t front poop out a magic baby this morning) who got to go hunting for hearts around the theater for our amusement, and allegedly for prizes.
So Rex learned to wear more than orange shorts for any potential Hat Show, although he looked like the cutest Hooters waitress EVER. Ashley helped drag him around, but we were all just counting down the minutes until she got to strip down. Awwwww yeahhhhh. That’s the holiday stuff. Her dress was hot though, even with the Brad suit over it. Damn you, Hat!
Sean’s Riffery was present, and Wheels managed to not roll his idiot shoes into anything valuable. Britt has played Columbia before, so it’s kind of like cheating, but it’s still hilarious. Adrienne vamped it up for Sweet T, and was fierce. So here’s the great part, right? Eris was Rocky. Eris usually plays Columbia. Columbia pours glitter on Rocky. Britt plays Rocky sometimes. Eris…got her comeuppance 🙂 Well, she tried hard to escape it, but here’s no escaping GLITTER JUSTICE (My new series with Steven Seagal and Adam Lambert)!!!
So we got a pile of new Transies, and they’re mostly hot girls who totally slutted it up for tonight. That’s some good sluttery, you’ll fit in well. Hopefully no one got herpes for Christmas. Remember Eris? Well, Sean plays Rocky too, and he poured about three handfuls of silver glitter all over Eris. She looked like half a cyborg. It was pretty epic. Retribution can be fun!
So Charles, when on stage as Frank, was wearing a big wrapped box as a costume, with a top flap that made him look like the box was talking. Box related shenanigans are win. Heather surprised us all by being able to actually move the motorcycle, and then Charles jumped in to do the lift with Britt. But then Britt wouldn’t stop screaming, so I beat him to death with my Festivus pole. It’s for the rest of us!
Everybody got candy, then Adrienne came out in her Frosty the Snowman corset. Hot. Sean and Wheels came out in matching shiny red thongs (owwwww, my eyes…they are burning) and shot the place up. It was cold, but we got to have the cast meeting inside! Yay!
Thanks to everyone for a great 2010, and we’ll be back in 2011 to take our pants off and do the helicopter! Also, Gus graduated college, and now he’s officially smart! Merry Christmas, bitches!