• Comic Relief!
08.12.2008 update by Starman

Much as I hate to toot my own horn... well, I don't see anyone else posting about this, so I have to.

Doc - a friend of the cast and maker of web-comics generously allowed me to do a guest-run on his comic as a tribute to our dearly departed (dammit!) Daniel.

The first three parts are up now, with another three parts on the way. Keep an eye out for the subtle cameos of several of your favorite Bastards.

Henry, We Knew Ye Hardly: Part One
Henry, We Knew Ye Hardly: Part Two
Henry, We Knew Ye Hardly: Part Three


And if you have a LiveJournal account, leave Doc some feedback on his journal. Share and Enjoy!

• Yay, more piccies!
08.11.2008 update by Madame Leah

Here are more of Billy's awesome pics. ENJOY! :-D

http://s240.photobucket.com/albums/ff114/deadhobbit/08aug09/

http://s240.photobucket.com/albums/ff114/deadhobbit/08aug02/

Love,

Madame Leah

• In case you didn't notice...
08.10.2008 update by Mr Saturn

Though it actually happened a week ago, I forgot to mention it here, so for those who only check this page, photos have been added for July 12th (the Pirate Show) and July 19th (our tribute to Daniel). Additionally, I updated the calendar information on the right-hand side of your screen. Enjoy!

• Cool Beans memorial for Daniel
07.28.2008 update by Madame Leah

For those of you who don't know, there is a memorial fun-time somewhat drinking and eating thing for Daniel this Wednesday, July 30, at Cool Beans in Denton at 8 P.M. Upstairs they will have all the short films he did running on the projector thing, and we will all be reminiscing the good times and the bad things that he so gleefuly did to piss people off. Since it is 'Beans there will be great food and good drinks. If you are broke, come out anyway. There are always coupons for buy one get one free in the phone books, papers, and college guides, and the burgers are big and cheap anyway. I hope to see a lot of people there that didn't get to make it to the funeral service last Wednesday. I will be there with my bells on. Cool Beans is located here:

1210 W Hickory St
Denton, TX 76201
(940) 382-7025

Not hard to get to, Hickory Street is right by UNT and only goes one way so you just about CAN'T get lost...just please be thinking ahead and CARPOOL because the parking kinda sucks and is limited. We will be upstairs.

I want to extend a special THANK YOU to everyone for your prayers and love and everything else during this and the last couple of weeks. It has been a hard haul for us, and on behalf of the Bastards and myself we really do thank you. Your donations along with ours allowed us to give $300.00 to the American Diabetes Association in Daniel's name.

Love to all,

Madame Leah

• White Trash Show Report Is Up!
07.27.2008 update by Starman

Yes, I slaved away for 20 minutes so that those of you who didn't come or couldn't get into the sold-out White Trash Theme Show could get a very rough description of what certain parts of it were like.

So tired. So very tired...

Check it out, bitches!

• Denton Show TONIGHT!
07.25.2008 update by MADAME LEAH

Hello Dentonites, tonight is the night! The Bastards return for another show in Denton, all starting at midnight tonight! Be sure to arrive early to get your Prop Packs and great seats. We have some new Bastard Lottery tickets that are sure to excite and inspire you to be evil, too, so don't miss that. Supplies are limited, though, so if you want 'em, make sure to get there early! We will also be hosting another memorial show for Daniel Henry, since it is on his home turf, and since some of you could not make it to the show or the service on Wednesday. I hope to see you there! Cheers all....

~Madame Leah

• Tonight
07.19.2008 update by Madame Leah

Tonight we will be dealing with this as we normally do with all trauma, so don't be surprised by anything you see or hear. It is an ALL METAL night, so wear your favorite T's in honor if you feel like it.

We will be taking up a collection for the family (not the Bastard family, the ones who are having to clean out his hell-hole of an apartment, I think they had to get de-tox in there to clean the damned kitchen *shudders*). You are not required by any means to do this but all is appreciated.

Also we would seriously like stories and bits about him. Please send them to me if you have them: madame_leah12@yahoo.com

Whew what a rehearsal last night, though. Thank you so much to those of you who came out, and are still around. We may not have talked a lot, but it means a lot to all of us that you are still there.

Peace my homies...

• Daniel
07.18.2008 update by Madame Leah

With a terribly heavy heart I am posting to inform you all that my brother, Daniel, died yesterday due to medical complications with his diabetes.

Daniel has been in LB since 2001 and was, next to myself, one of the last Old School members remaining. He is so incredible and wonderful I can't even begin to tell you how much this hurts. Most of you know him as Riff, some of you know him as that weird UNT TA, some of you know him as the biggest asshole on the face of the planet that does sound for LB, but all of us know him as OUR asshole Daniel.

I will post much more later on about what we will be doing at the show to honor him. Please keep your chin up for the Bastards as we are not having such a great time at the moment.

If you have any suggestions as to something you think he would enjoy please email me.

• Oops...
07.13.2008 update by Madame Leah

Ha ha ha it would help if I actually posted the link...see, I can be stupid too...but the cast can tell you that already...ha ha ha...

http://s240.photobucket.com/albums/ff114/deadhobbit/pirate08/

And seriously, Arrrrrr!!!!

• ARRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!
07.13.2008 update by Madame Leah

Ahoy me mateys! Here is a link to Billy's pics from the pirate show! If you have not seen the rest of his pics, you should check them out. Hopefully I post this somewhat right. Our other cast pics should be posted soon, along with Shannon's Pirate Show Report.

I had a hell of a lot of fun at this show, and I know lots of you did, too. :) Thank you, all you Bastard Lovers out there, for making our 2008 Pirate Show a blast, and for always supporting us! And Casey, Corey, Aleesha, hope you had great birthdays, and that you will have some great memories! (Dammit, did you eat all the cake??? I really wanted to eat glitter cake!) Arrrrrr!!!!!

Love to all,

Madame Leah

• New (?) Pics
07.10.2008 update by Mr Saturn

We've unearthed some pictures from our October 26th show. October 26th of 2006. So they're over a year and a half old. But they're from an away show, at the late, great Ben's 1/2 Yard House! Enjoy!

• Denton Show...more news!
07.08.2008 update by Madame Leah

Howdy there fellow Bastards and Bastard Lovers! Just letting you know that, to make it easier on all of us, the Tavern in Denton's tickets are going to be $7 from here on out, just like the regular shows there. So no more confusion as to what the price is! We are good to go otherwise and we look forward to seeing you all there!

LOVE!

~ Madame Leah :)

• DENTON SHOW - FRIDAY, JULY 25, 2008!!!
07.01.2008 update by Madame Leah

Helllllooooooooo all you Bastard Lovers, and especially my fellow Dentonites! I just received notification that we will be having a show at the Denton Movie Tavern on Friday, July 25, at Midnight!

More info to come on this but wanted to get this out there first. We will see you there! <3

~ Madame Leah

• HOORAY!
06.30.2008 update by Madame Leah

GOOD TIMES AND HAPPINESS!!!

I can post on the main page now, without it looking all retarded and everything. This is a good thing for me, and possibly a bad thing for the rest of you, because NOW I can torture you whenever I wish with new posts and such. :) (That means I won't have to filter them through Starman - lol). Enjoy that freedom.

LOVE!

~Madame Leah :)

• New video
06.29.2008 update by Mr Saturn

I've uploaded a new video to YouTube. This is from Saturday Night's show. For those who were there, I'm sure this is no surprise. To those who weren't, it was quite an event. Feel free to watch the video at your leisure. This one's a little personal for me. Sorry if I'm a bit sentimental. :D

• What a Weekend!
06.25.2008 update by Starman

Between Fed-Con and The Renn Fest show, I'm amazed we survived the weekend unscathed.

Come to that, given the way my feet feel right now, I'm not sure I did survive the weekend unscathed

Well, irrespective and irregardless, why not take a look at some of the show reports of the last few weeks while we get all of this weekend's activities accounted for.

Or call your dad. Assuming you know who he is or don't live with your parents. It IS Father's Day, for crying out loud! Show some respect to your sperm donor!

• Show Report For Squid's Final Show Is Up!
06.01.2008 update by Starman

What follows is a terrifying journey into the world of probate, beneificiaries and goblins.

...

Fine. Fine. No goblins! I give you... THE LIVING SHOW REPORT! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

• Denton Show Canceled
05.16.2008 update by Starman

Due to too many events being booked the same night, we have been forced to cancel our Denton Show on the 23rd.

We apologize for the cancellation, especially to our Denton fans who don't get to Fort Worth very often. We hope that you'll show up at the free A-Kon show the next weekend.

We'll try and get a show scheduled up there again ASAP. Promise!

• Upcoming Theme Shows
05.05.2008 update by Starman

We actually have our theme-show schedule planned through the end of the year. You can see them all on the Cast MySpace Calendar. Over on the left side of the screen. See the link?

I'm only going to list the theme shows through June here, though. Why? Well, because for me to unleash the full glory of what the year has in store for us would drive you mad! Mad, I say! Mad!

Also, we only have the attention span to focus on so much at a time. And I'm also very lazy and we only have so much space to post things here. Yeah, that's the ticket!

80'S THEME SHOW - MAY 24TH - Join us as we celebrate a magical decade. The decade of Springsteen and Madonna; way before Nirvana. There was U2 and Blondie and music was still on MTV. Tawny Kitaen was still hot and Tom Hanks still made funny movies. So put on your best torn jeans, call up Diane Court and ask her out to Walk The Dinosaur with us.

A-KON - MAY 30TH - The Biggest Anime/Manga Con in North America and we're performing Rocky there on a Friday night! Why? What does Rocky have to do with Anime? Well, some might say that the character of Frank is obviously born of the same Jungian subconcious that inspires the tradition of Kabuki or overtly feminine pretty-boy male characters. Personally, I think they just like to have one event where they can be assured that the half-naked people are of legal age but that may just be my cynicism talking. Just remember to check for ID before you engage in Con Sex and have your cat-people spayed or neutered.

FED-CON - JUNE 13TH - The Biggest Star Trek Con of Europe comes to North America and we're peforming Rocky there on a Friday night! Why? What does Rocky have to do with Star Trek? Absolutely nothing, apart from both being science fiction and all of those jokes we make about 'who gives the best head on the Starship Enterprise?'. But it will be worth seeing, if only to watch all the nerds having asthama attacks as they see naked boobs up-close for the first time since the age of two. (I kid! I kid because I love my nerdy brethren!)

RENN FEST THEME SHOW - JUNE 14TH - Scarborough Faire may be over but you can still slip on a bad British accent, slap the arse of a bawdy wench and sing bawdy songs about arse-slapping and bawdy wenches in a bad British accent as we travel back in time to the magical days before indoor plumbing and toothbrushes. But more importantly, also the days before bras and underpants were invented. Remember ladies - with all the regimental Scotsmen running around, the benefits of this go both ways... much like most of our cast. Hey-ooooooooooh!

• Fetish Show 2008
04.09.2008 update by Starman

Put on your leathers (or whatever your favorite fetish garb is), oil your whip and bring your favorite slave out for a night of debauchery and theater unlike any you have seen before.



Tickets are $6.00 and can be bought at the theater or at movietavern.com. We suggest buying them as soon as possible as we do expect this show to sell out.

All of our patrons are expected to follow the following rules while at the show.

1. Please Dress Appropriate Outside The Theater

While we encourage our audience to dress up in a suitable manner for all of our theme shows, other people do attend our theater in the wee hours of a Saturday night. Some of them bring small children. Of course in a fair and just world the police would ask why - if these parents are so concerned about "protecting their innocent children from being exposed to bad influences" - are they taking them along with them to see an movie at 11 PM in a bar at night. Sadly, this world is not fair or just and we do need to maintain the peace of the theater.

So please, bring a long-coat or some other bit of clothing to cover-up with. Even if you’re wearing something skin-tight (i.e. tight enough that you might as well be naked), your costume is painted on or you have a costume that is illegally revealing, please - wait until you are inside the theater to show off your costume and/or your piercings.

In other words, keep your tits, asses and pee-pees covered!

2. Keep Your Hands, Feet and Objects To Yourself.

Yes, this is a Fetish show. Yes, there will be dancing and all manner of erotic display. That doesn’t mean you get to become Grabby McFingers. So before you go touchy-touchy on the actors or other audience members, ask first. If we find out that you’ve been grabbing anyone who doesn’t want to be grabbed, our Security team will smite you like the fist of an angry god.

3. No Sex. Period.

Rocky Horror - even on an ordinary weekend - is a very sexual show. You may get hot and bothered. We understand. It’s a perfectly natural thing for a young person your age. But please, for the love of all that is good n’plenty, keep it in your pants until you get home.

Do not have sex in the theater. Do not have sex in the bathroom. Do not have sex in the parking lot. Failure to abide by this rule will result in you being arrested, banned from the theater and a whole bunch of people laughing at you.

• I want YOU to join the Bastards!
03.31.2008 update by Starman

In case you haven't heard the good news, we are once again recruiting for our merry band of misfits. We need blood. New blood. And fresh meat. BWAHAHA-HA-HA-HA-HA!

*ahem* That is to say, we are looking for new cast members.

The qualifications are simple enough.

#1 You have to be at least 18 years of age, That way there's no question as to whether or not you are a legal adult when your mom complains about how you spend your weekends or the cops come to investigate rumors of a "little girl" dancing in her underwear.

#2 You must have have your own reliable form of transport. Your mom's/dad's/boyfriend's/girlfriend's/roommate's/anybody else's car is not good enough. Fort Worth Mass Transit might be considered reliable, but do you really want to take the bus in your costume?

#3 You must be available every Friday and Saturday from 11 pm until we're done with you. Fridays we rehearse. Saturdays we perform. If you can't be here for rehearsal, you don't get to perform and if you can't be here for the performance, there's no point in rehearsing.

#4 You must be joining the cast for reasons other than trying to get laid. You'd think this would be a no-brainer, but after having someone tell me outright that he was only interested in joining because he heard Rocky girls were total sluts... well, I was torn between laughing at the idiot or letting the ladies inform him of how very wrong he is after several weeks of pain and humiliation. I decided on laughing, simply because I didn't want to have to help hide another dead body this year.

#5 You must not be stupid or at least be stupid in a productive and funny way. Because if we can't get a use out of you, you'd damn well better be able to make us laugh. See #4 for an example of how stupid is too stupid.

Seriously, if you would like to join the few, the proud, the not going to finish that statement lest we be sued or roughed up by the USMC... please send an e-mail to Madame Leah.

• Special Shows, Every Weekend in March!
03.10.2008 update by Starman

First of all, thanks to all of you who came to the All-Con show on Friday night and everybody from A-Kon who came to our regular show on Saturday night.

Merry Bastard Mayhem continues to spread across DFW, as we have a special show every weekend for the rest of this month. Read on for the grisly details...

LOS BASTARDOS 10TH ANNIVERSARY SHOW - MARCH 15TH - It's shocking to think that Los Bastardos has been around as a troupe - in some form or fashion - for nearly a decade. It's even more shocking to find out that, despite years of living like rockstars (i.e. using drugs and having sex with anything with a pulse), there are any old Bastards left from those days. But there are. And for one night only, they'll be coming back to perform for you all - squeezing into old costumes and fighting arthritis the whole time. Don't make fun of them though. They might hit you with their walkers.

EASTER SHOW - MARCH 22ND - Join us as we celebrate the pagan festival of fertility and springtime that was "adopted" (re: stolen) by Christians in order to make their religion more politically acceptable to the masses by allowing them to do the same rituals but by calling it by a different name, saying they were honoring the erection of Jesus of Nazareth. (NOTE: If that factoid/joke offends you, you might want to skip this show. Cause this is going to be bad. Even for us.)

DENTON SHOW - MARCH 28TH - The latest in our series of bi-monthly command performances at the Denton Movie Tavern in Denton. It's the same old show in a different town at a different theater. But you're getting to see Rocky Horror in Denton! That's like... meta. Super meta! And there's a bar called Rocky's just down the street! And between Rocky's and the Movie Tavern is the Denton Episcopalian Church! Trust me - that's really funny if you've paid attention during the first five minutes of the movie.

• Come To All-Con At 8 PM!
02.27.2008 update by Starman

You all know how we're having this big damn show at All-Con on Friday, March 7th, at 11 PM, with a big damn party afterwards in a hotel suite, right?

You don't? Well, you should. And you do now. So there.

But what you may not have known is that some of the cast (myself included) will be guests of honor for a panel at 8 PM entitled Rocky Horror 101: The Experience Explained.

Now, odds are if you're reading this, you're a fan, and as such don't really need much explained. But we'd still like to see lots of our fans (who should all be showing up for the show later that night anyway, hint-hint) there to wish us luck and be the first to ask us the questions they've always wanted to ask.

And no - "Will Leah Get Naked Tonight?" is not a valid question.